literature

FFH: Chapter 6 - Welcome Home

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The waiting room was an exercise in restraint. Not only in keeping all the violent swears that came to mind, but for the parents of some of the children who insisted on trying to “play” with me. Fortune smiled on us at the Guard station, for the statements weren’t time consuming and we arrived in time to catch Colm’s appointment. We still had to wait, but only for a few moments, nerve wracking as they were. The kids weren’t the only ones to stare, just the only ones honest enough to say they wanted a closer look. It took all I had not to turn to everyone in the room and flip the bird when the nurse finally called Colm’s name.

“I am eternally grateful you didn’t leave me in the waiting room.” I said when we got to an examination room, waiting once more for the doctor to arrive. “If you had, I’m pretty sure you would’ve gotten your pants sued off from all the lawsuits.”

“Heh. An’ why’s that?” Colm asked, setting me down on the windowsill by the examination table. It seemed like the best place, if only because he wasn’t sure where a safer place would be to keep me out of the doctor’s way.

“Probably would’ve screamed ‘I’VE GOT RABIES’ just to make sure no one came close to me.”

“…Do ye have rabies?”

“Of course not. Something tells me they’d’ve believed it anyway.”

The nurse that came in to take Colm’s vitals kept looking over in my direction, screwing up several times throughout the process. Colm was too patient to say anything, but I was close to telling her off each time she glanced over. She eventually finished, but it wasn’t soon enough for me. I still wasn’t sure what was worse: being stared at by a crowd or by an individual.

“G’morning there, Colm!” a woman said in a cheery manner as she walked into the room. Clipboard in hand, wearing a doctor’s coat over a t-shirt and jeans, her gray hair wrapped neatly into a bun, it wasn’t hard to tell this was the Doctor Boothby we were waiting for. “And how are we feeling today?”

“Doin’ alright, Doc. Just wanted tuh have me hand looked at befer I head home.” Colm replied, unwrapping the bandage around his hand. The swelling and purple color had receded for the most part, but the palm of his hand still had a dark blue tinge to it.

“Oh my, I see someone had a run-in with some poison bramble!” Boothby said as she inspected the wound. She squeezed a few times on his hands and fingers, testing Colm’s reaction. “Thought an experienced Faol Scout would have known better than to go near that stuff.”

“Wasne a Faol Scout that went near it…” Colm grumbled, glancing in my direction. He may have looked annoyed, but there was no way I was going to pass up the opportunity to rub it in. I smiled the brightest smile I could and gave him a little wave. That was when Doctor Boothby finally noticed me.

“Ah, well, that explains why Liz was so eager to gossip with the other interns.” Doctor Boothby said, giving a short wave of her own. “Doctor Julie Ann Boothby, M.D., General Practice. Nice to meet you…?”

“Bridget. Nice to meet you too, Doctor.”

“And just how close to the bramble did you get, Bridget?”

“I was in the middle of it.”

“What?! And you’re still alive?!” she asked, taking her eyes off the wound long enough to look my way.

“Didn’t get a single scratch. Hell, even the bramble rats couldn’t lay a finger on me.”

“Oi! Thanks tuh me, if ye remember correctly!” Colm interjected, before relaying the story of the bramble fiasco. I interrupted when necessary to set the facts straight, but he recalled it properly for the most part. “So what’s the damage, Doc?”

“Thankfully, not very much. It was a good thing you had your first aid kit on hand, otherwise you would’ve been a goner for sure.” she said, moving over to a counter and pulling vials from the cabinets above her. “The injury is minimal, but I’ll whip you up something to take right now. You should see the wound and symptoms clear up by the morning. No major spell work for at least a week, don’t want you straining yourself just yet.”

I almost didn’t hear her recommendation because I was so fascinated by what she was doing. She had a chemistry set, or rather a potion set, laid out in front of her. Doctor Boothby measured, poured, and mixed so fast that it was almost hypnotic. The end result was a golden liquid in a glass, similar in color to the Rodelia oil but of a thicker texture and darker hue.

“Drink every last drop and I’ll bind your hand again. Want to keep it clean until you can take it off tomorrow.” she instructed, taking out a length of gauze and wrapping his hand while Colm chugged the potion. “For future reference, no more poison bramble antics. That goes for both of you. Just because you were extremely lucky the first time, it doesn’t mean you’ll fare just as well a second time. Got it?”

“Got it, Doctor.” I replied, hopping onto Colm’s hand when he offered it.

“Good. Now get out of here so I don’t have to hear any more of the nurses giggling out there.”

“What ‘bout the bill, Doc?” Colm asked, just as he was about to open the door.

“I’ll send you one later. Just head home already! Plenty of food, water, and rest, alright?”

“Ye doona have tuh tell me twice, Doc!”

While I was glad to be out of the office and far from the waiting room full of eyes, the stares and whispers followed as we made our way down the streets once more.

“Uh, Scruffy? There a reason in particular why everyone keeps gawking at me?” I asked, catching sight of a little girl who was trying to wave at me. The kid had the widest smile in the world when I waved back.

“Well, guess it’s ‘cuz here in Arcadia, humans arne as common as they are in other places.” Colm answered, turning off the main road and onto a side street. There were less people to be seen, but as far as I was concerned that was still too many Giants for me. “Towns like Rosecrest an’ Tiptoft an’ Moordown have ‘nuff humans runnin’ ‘bout that they’re not such a…curiosity, ye can say.”

“…You are not making me feel better, just so you know.”

“I’m just sayin’ that….damn, how did Tim put it? Somethin’ like…there are weak spots in the Veil an’ when Humans Cross O’er they go through those spots, so they end up in places like Rosecrest more often than they do Arcadia.”

“That…makes sense? I guess?” I said, slightly confused but not about to push the issue. It just meant yet another thing to research, if possible, to find my own way back. “How much further are we from your home anyway?”

Our home, Runt. An’ not much further, we’re gettin’ pretty close already.” Colm said, stopping to look at something across the street.

“What’s the matter? Why’d you…” I asked, trailing off when I saw what caught his attention and my fingers tightened in an instant on Colm’s bandanna. We had passed a shop with a large brightly colored sign hanging in the window:

50% SALE ON ALL CAGES AND AQUARIUMS AT IRV’S PET EMPORIUM!

All sorts of paralyzing thoughts flew through my mind. I was dead set against being in some cage, and it wasn’t just because I didn’t like the idea of being kept behind bars the rest of my life. If I were forced into a cage, it would just permanently establish my status as a pet in this Giant world. I always wrote about how scary it would be inside any kind of enclosure, but I sure as Hell didn’t want to experience that firsthand. A shiver went down my spine and I couldn’t help but quake on Colm’s shoulder. He took no notice however, and continued maneuvering between the crowded streets. Or so I thought.

“I told ye befer, I doona like cages.” he said, turning back onto the main road. “Me word is me bond. I’m not gettin’ one fer ye, I promise.”

Hope you can keep your word, Colm I thought, trying to shake off the uneasy feeling the store brought.

It was when I looked down towards the sidewalk that it came back to me. I was a few dozen feet off the ground and moving. My acrophobia was sure to have kicked back in by now, but…I wasn’t as frightened anymore. Sure, it was still a constant reminder in the pit of my stomach and on the edge of my mind. Somehow, I almost forgot how terrified I usually was of heights. I guess there were more important things to worry about while stuck amongst Giants, huh?

“Here we are Runt! Home Sweet Home!” Colm said, stirring me from my brooding. I expected to see a one story house or, at the very least, some run-down apartment building when I looked up. It wouldn’t have surprised me if we ended up at some hovel on the wrong side of the tracks. The way this man dressed and acted, I thought for sure he was all about living a simple life.

Boy was my face red when I realized we were standing in front of an enormous mansion. I recognized it as the same one I saw just the night before, sitting on the edge of the city overlooking it. Even if I were in proportion, it still would have been a very impressive building. Its three stories were painted a simple white, with large golden doors and window panes. A cobblestone footpath led to the front door cut through the sprawling front lawn, trees and flowers scattered amongst the freshly mowed grass. It reminded me of those grand manor houses you saw in the countryside of some far off place, certainly not something you’d see anywhere near a city. A tall, spiked golden fence surrounded the estate and glinted in the sun.

“Sweet Chinchilla Jesus…” I said, too stunned to say anything more worthwhile.

“Impressive, isne it?” Colm chuckled as he began walking towards the open gates, the pair of security guards stepping aside to let him pass. He gave a wave to the both of them, and they saluted.

“So, what, you work here or something? Will the owners even allow me on the premises?” I asked, taking in the sight of the vast yard while we walked up the path. A couple of gardeners looked up to give Colm a wave, who returned the gesture. If the front yard was this huge, I could only wonder what the back yard looked like.

“Trust me Runt, the –heh- owners ‘llow pets. What makes ye think I work here though?”

“Name’s not ‘Runt’, Scruffy, and, well…just look at you: you’re practically a working laundry pile who hasn’t seen a razor in days. Do you even know what soap is?”

“Ha! If I dinna know any better, I’d say ye just insulted me.”

“Only hurts if it’s true, Scruffy.” I quipped as Colm hopped onto the front porch and reached for the front door. “Whoa, shouldn’t we be going through the side entrance or something?”

Colm took a moment to consider my suggestion, eventually taking his hand off the door handle.

“…Yer right. We canna just come in through the front door.” he stated, making his way off the porch and towards the side of the house. “We’ll sneak in through the servant’s entrance.”

“W-wait, why do we have to ‘sneak in’?” I asked as we cut through the lawn, with Colm careful to avoid the gardeners’ tools and recently tended flowers. “Oh God, you were lying and they don’t allow ‘pets’ and you’re gonna be fired if they see me I KNEW IT!”

“It’s not that! I just doona want James –the head butler- tuh see me yet.”

“…Oh my God, we’re going to be in so much trouble.”

I kept a tight grip as Colm found the side entrance, bracing myself for whom or whatever might be on the other side. When he opened the door, intoxicating smells of food cooking in the enormous kitchen filled the air. There were people manning the ovens and stoves, but only one turned to see who entered. Colm gave a silent “shhh” gesture when she opened her mouth to speak, but she smiled and mouthed a “welcome back” before turning back to her pot. He stole an apple from a basket before sneaking toward a door across the room.

“Hold on tight now, an’ doona make a sound.” Colm instructed, opening the door with great care. “We should be able tuh-!”

“OH!” the girl exclaimed as Colm bumped into her. The sheets she held fell to the floor on impact. “Watch where you’re going, you-! OH! Oh, I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean that, s-!”

“Ridley! No, it’s my fault, sorry!” Colm whispered, bending down to help her pick up her sheets. “I was just tryin’ tuh surprise James!”

“T-that won’t do any good. He already knows you’re on your way home.” Ridley whispered back, brushing her blonde braid over her shoulder before refolding the linens. She caught sight of me, but quickly turned away.

“Wha-?! How?!”

“I…I told him I saw you at the Inn last night.”

“I thought I saw ye in the restaurant! Havin’ dinner with friends or somethin’?”

“Y-you could say that. They were from out of town so…”

“Got ye. Wait, does James know I’m home now?”

“I don’t think so. Was going to change the sheets, but if you need me to check-!”

“No, that’s alright, go on ‘head. We’ll see ye later, aye?”

Ridley nodded, going ahead down the corridor. She looked back once, when she reached the end, but was out of sight soon enough. Colm waited a moment to take off his boots before tip-toeing down the hall. He stopped at the end, peeking around the corner to see if anyone was in the next room. It turned out to be the house’s foyer, and it almost took my breath away. The walls were painted a beautiful shade of green and sunlight beamed through the tall windows. Light refracted off of the gigantic chandelier that hung above us, splashing rainbows across the room. A tall, expansive staircase in the middle of the entrance hall led to the second floor and beyond. There were doorways to other rooms on each side of the staircase, which were probably as grand, if not more so, than the hall. An enormous bouquet of flowers sat in a vase upon a table. They were being tended by a man with short, salt and pepper hair with his back towards us. Based on the uniform he was wearing, it was easy to guess this was the head butler.

Colm crept closer to him, not a sound to be heard as he took careful step after careful step. I closed my eyes and braced for impact: physical, verbal, or otherwise.

“…Young man, I have worked and lived in this house for nearly 25 years. Did you really think you could sneak up on me so easily?”

“…Maybe?” Colm replied. When the man turned around, however, Colm sighed in defeat and slipped his boots back on. “No…”

“Welcome home nonetheless, Lord Colm.” the butler said, vigorously shaking his hand.

Wait.

Did I hear him right?

“…‘Lord’ Colm?” I uttered in disbelief.

“Good tuh be back, James.” Colm replied, giving the man a pat on the shoulder. “I trust e’erythin’ was well while I was gone?”

“‘Lord’ Colm?”

“Of course, sir. Just because you choose to walk around like a disheveled mess doesn’t mean your house shall ever fall to similar disrepair.” James retorted, a friendly smile on his face the whole time.

“‘LORD’ Colm?!” I almost shouted, finally catching Colm’s attention.

“Oh aye, doona s’pose I e’er told ye me whole name, did I?” he chuckled, clearing his throat when he was finished. “I am Lord Colm Matthew Alexander Brian Arcadi, Magistrate uv’Arcadia, High Lord uv’all Fathach, High Commander uv’er forces, Defender uv’er peoples, by the grace a’ the gods, long may I reign.”

A thousand quips and comments came and went after hearing all of that. None of them passed my lips.

“YOU RUN A FUCKING COUNTRY?! YOU?!

“I rest my case, sir.” James chuckled, his attention now on me. “Allow me to introduce myself: James Livingston, Head Butler for the Arcadi Manor. A pleasure to meet you, miss.”

“B-bridget Bradley, nice to meet you Mr. Livingston. Don’t suppose you’re the king of the universe in disguise or anything like that?”

“If only that were the case, miss. I am but a mere butler.” he replied. His light brown eyes seemed to light up when he smiled. “Lunch will be ready within the hour if you’d like to shower and change. Will you need anything else, sir?”

“Not at the moment, James, thank ye. Oh! But I did pick up a surprise fer ye while I was out, think ye’ll like it!”

“I’m sure I will, sir.”

With that, Colm bounded up the stairway to the second floor while James went back to arranging the bouquet. It took all my strength to hold on the whole time, hoping Colm would remember, at least, not to sprint down the hall when we reached the top. Thankfully he did, though he was still walking at a fast pace towards the end of the corridor. Portraits, antique vases, and tables adorned the hallway outside of several other doors. I couldn’t recall ever seeing so many entrance ways in one place before. I snapped myself out of it when he stopped.

“‘Lord’ Colm?” I asked, still dumbfounded at the notion.

“Doesne have the same ring as ‘Scruffy’, but I doona think I mind.” he casually remarked as he opened the doors to reveal a vast room on the other side.

The master bedroom was luxurious and immense beyond my imagining. A canopied king-sized bed sat in the middle of the room, with the velvet midnight blue drapes tied to the bed posts. A matching divan sat at the end of the bed, with mahogany nightstands on either side. A sofa chair with matching ottoman of similar hue and wood sat in a corner of the room in front of a lavish fireplace, surrounded by two bookcases. The curtains that hung on the high windows, the window seat cushions, and the chairs surrounding a table all had similar shades of blue and type of wood. Mahogany was the theme in this room, as a dresser and bureau of the same wood were found on either side of the room. If I didn’t know any better, I’d have said the floor was made of the same material, if you could see it from underneath the lush carpet. Two sets of doors were in the room, one leading to a walk-in closet and one leading into what I had to assume was the bathroom. Colm set me down on the table before throwing his backpack onto one of the matching chairs.

“That’s not what I meant!” I yelled at him as he sat down on the edge of the bed to take off his shoes. “And I sure as Hell am not going to start calling you that, Scruffy!”

“That’s the spirit, Runt.”

“Name’s not…that’s not…it’s…so…” I rattled off, not sure how to finish anything at first. It was all so confusing and it was just starting to make my head ache. “Why didn’t you say anything before?!”

“I dinna think it was all that important.”

“You didn’t think-?! You’re a freaking king of a whole damn country! How is that not important?!”

“Not a king, not exactly. When me ancestor, Maureen Arcadi, landed here an’ founded Fathach, she dinna want a monarchy. Ran ‘way from one in the first place, ye know. That’s why the Aracadis are Lords an’ Ladies, not Kings an’ Queens. Would it have made ye hate me any less if ye knew right from the start?”

“I’d’ve probably hated you more!” I stated, pacing back and forth on the tabletop. “Would’ve thought you were some kind of…spoiled… egotistical…asshole who thought he could do whatever he wanted!”

“But now?”

“But now I’m thinking all that, you giant dipshit!”

“…An’ I woodne have it any other way.” he said, kneeling down beside the table so we were “eye to eye”, so to speak. “Will ye be alright here on yer own for a few minutes? I could really do with a shower an’ change a’ clothes.”

“Trust me, the smell from the last few days wasn’t lost on me. And hey, it’s cool, don’t ask if I want to do the same or anything.”

“I’m sure we can jury-rig somethin’ fer now, ‘til I get supplies fer ye. Unless ye wanna hop in the sink or shower with-?”

“NOPE. STOP. DON’T FINISH THAT SENTENCE.”

“Ye sure ye doona wanna hop on the bed at least?”

“No thanks, I’ll just sulk and brood here on the table. Go wash the funk off of you before I gag to death.”

As soon as he closed the bathroom door behind him and the shower started to run, I took the time to survey my surroundings. Every detail mattered if I was going to make my grand escape after all. I mean, I wasn’t so much of an untalented hack that I couldn’t think of something feasible! The plan for the hotel room would have worked, why wouldn’t it now? So what if I didn’t actually have the physical strength and ability to do stuff like jump and climb? Or the nerves and brains to try something despite the odds against me?

…Okay, so I was seriously more screwed then I thought. Didn’t mean I should give up right then and there.

Jumping off the table wouldn’t be wise and would most definitely end in either me getting caught or getting hurt. I wasn’t ready to risk either just then. Waiting until Colm was asleep seemed like the best time to try it, with him and most of the household -however many people there were- out of commission. The canopy drapes on his bed had great potential as a hiding spot, or a distraction if I could manage it. It was one of those times I wished I was better at sports or science, or just about any useful activity in general. Gah! Why couldn’t I think of anything more cunning? I said before I wasn’t particularly clever, didn’t I? With a deep sigh I crossed my arms and gazed out the nearest window as best I could, lost in my thoughts.

Even if I somehow made it out of the room, how was I going to get out of the house? The stairs were sure to be a pain in the ass, in more ways than one, and there was no guarantee I wouldn’t be caught right off the bat. With another heavy sigh, I closed my eyes and tried thinking harder.

Logic and cunning, don’t fail me now!

It didn’t work.

My mind kept flashing between possible capture, injuries, and even -heaven forbid- deaths. The faces of family and friends I may never see again. The past couple of days, how fantastical and terrifying the experience had been. On Colm himself, how easy it was to talk to him, to get used to him. Was it because he was the only person I “knew” in this world? Because he was one of the few who talked to me and not “at” or “over” me? Why was he willing to keep me as a pet, yet carry on conversations like I was an equal at the same time? How could he treat someone who was just like him, only smaller, like some novelty to be kept on his shoulder? It was like he saw me as a person and a pet at the same time. The thoughts were more confusing and distressing than informative, to say the least. I tried to put them as far back into my mind as I could. For now.

A door opened and closed before I had the chance to get up, but I saw the closet door shut when I turned around. Just as I was about to continue my window-gazing, a loud POP filled the air.

“HOLY CRAP!” I yelled, dodging out of the way as a humongous object slammed down on the table-top. The quake from their landing almost made me fall, but I caught myself in time. “What the Hell?!”

“Are ye alright out there?” Colm called from the closet. “Thought I heard somethin’ pop just now!”

“Something did pop!” I yelled back, hoping he could hear me. “I think…I think an office just dropped on your table!”

“A what?”

“You’ll see when you get out here!”

On closer inspection, the “object” turned out to be a stack of papers and folders. The pile was too high and too heavy to read anything, but I thought I saw snippets of contracts and the edges of official seals on some of the corners. As I got a closer look, a softer POP signaled the arrival of another item. When I looked around the papers to see what it was, a sudden curiosity, the likes I never thought I had, coursed through me. The title, written in golden embossed script, read:

PERSONAL DAY PLANNER OF COLM ARCADI

Suffice to say, the urge to read it was irresistible.

A golden fountain pen sat on the binding, its clip fitting somewhere within the pages. Lifting the cover was harder than expected, but it wasn’t something I couldn’t handle. The first page was devoted to contact information for several people, including Annie, Stryfe, and various other names. The photograph stuck onto the front cover kept me from turning to the next page. A family was enjoying a picnic, or maybe they were in their backyard, I couldn’t rightly tell. Even if it wasn’t in his planner, it wasn’t hard to identify a young Colm among the faces. The family resemblance was very strong between the father and the children, but the mother’s features weren’t hard to spot among them either. If they weren’t wearing different color shirts, I could’ve easily mistaken one brother for the other. Hell, if the sister wasn’t wearing a dress and had dirty blonde hair rather than strawberry blonde, I would’ve said they were…

“Aaahh…twins. At least for the boys. I think. Triplets maybe, though they look near identical, not fraternal. How is that possible?” I said to myself. With one look around, the doubt was relegated to the back of my mind. “But then again this is supposed to be impossible too. Maybe science is funky here for all I know.”

Even if I wanted to close the planner, it was too late: the closet door opened again. I pretended to ignore the footsteps as they got closer, not turning as Colm take a seat somewhere behind me.

“Are you decent?” I asked, reading the rest of the names on the contacts page. There were quite a few more Arcadis than I thought there’d be, though most of them were listed in other cities.

“Heh. I like tuh think I look a damned sight better than ‘decent’!” he replied, shuffling through the papers beside me.

“If I turn around and you’re naked I’m going to-!” I began to threaten, only to stop when I did take a look at him.

The constant Five O’clock Shadow and whiskers on his chin were gone, but his sideburns were still ridiculously long. His bangs continued their attempt to hide his eyes, even when the rest of his hair was combed back and held in place with a ribbon. The ribbon matched his tie, tucked into a golden waistcoat. A sapphire blue suit jacket hung on the back of his chair and, shock of shocks, it matched his tie as well. The aroma of his cologne was subtle, but powerful enough to be noticed. It was a nice scent: blueberries and some kind of mint, though I couldn’t identify it. Somehow they mixed well together to make a very pleasant aroma.

“Well, what do you know? You clean up nice, Scruffy. You almost look like you can be taken seriously now.”

“Ha! High praise from down below!” he chuckled before taking a closer look at the pile. “Gods preserve me, why coodne she gimme one damned day tuh relax befer sendin’ alla this paperwork?”

“Who’s ‘she’?”

“Lydia, my personal assistant an’ publicist. This is prob’ly’er revenge fer not bein’ able tuh contact me the last few days. Do ye see a lil’ black book anywhere? Er, no, I guess it woodne be lil’ tuh ye, would it?”

“The one that says ‘Personal Day Planner of Colm Arcadi’?”

“Heh. An’ just what do ye think yer doin’?” Colm asked when he finally noticed the book open in front of me.

“Oh, you know, just invading your privacy for my own amusement. Didn’t get too far though, if that’s any consolation.” I replied, noticing a bookmark in one of the pages. It turned out to be a post-it note with the message “DON’T FORGET THE SPRING’S END BALL THIS SUNDAY – Lydia” scribbled on it. “What’s the Spring’s End Ball, Scruffy?’

“It’s an end a’ the season celebration just befer Grie-wait, where’d ye see that?” Colm asked, taking the book away from me. He read the note, checked the date, read the note again, and did some calculations on his fingers. “That canna be this Sunday, it’s…no, wait…oh gods above, it IS this Sunday! I canna believe I fergot!”

“It’s a wonder this country hasn’t fallen into ruin yet, Scruffy.”

“Hardy-har-har, Runt. That’s-oh! Wait a minute!” Colm began, shooting across the room the second something came to mind. He searched through his nightstand drawers before returned with what looked like a card and a pen. Scribbling as fast as he was able, he kept what he was writing hidden from me every time I tried to peek. With a quick “Diminish”, it was shrunk down and “handed” to me as cordially as he could manage. “Fer one Miss Bridget Bradley, if’n ye please.”

“Oh my, I wonder what this could possibly be?” I said in a dramatic tone. When I read it, however, my surprise was genuine. It was a “personalized” invitation to attend the Spring’s End Ball on June 3rd, complete with a message that said “Hope to see you there! –Colm” at the bottom. By the look on his face I could tell this was meant to be a sincere gesture, but I couldn’t let him know I thought as much. “I’ll have to check my schedule, but I’m pretty sure I’m booked up for the weekend. I simply haven’t a thing to wear even if I could accept.”

“Heh. Well, ye’ve got plenty a’ time tuh change yer mind, if ye can fit us in, that is.”

“And you just happened to have an extra invitation on hand?”

“Well, I always have a few just in case. Me Auntie Mel…er, Aunt Imelda, I mean, she almost ne’er comes tuh the house nowadays but we make sure tuh mail one out fer’er. Think uv’it as ‘mergency invites, I s’pose.”

“Wait. ‘Spring’s End’?” I asked, the name finally hitting me when I read the invitation again. “Does that mean summer is only starting?”

“Aye, it does.” Colm confirmed.

“Huh. Weird. It was the middle of August back home. I guess you guys are a few months behind us.”

“Why doona we head down tuh my study so I can clear this paperwork an’ show ye ‘round the house?”

His study was certainly impressive, I had to give him that. An antique desk and velvet chair stood out in front of tall bay windows, letting in the sunlight. The walls of the room were covered head to toe with books and various decorations ranging from medals to diplomas to paintings. A small fireplace nestled just beside the desk helped complete the look even if the logs settled within weren’t lit. It looked like they hadn’t been set ablaze in some time. The lamp and the typewriter on his desk were shades of blue, and were probably the newest items in the whole room. A stack of unopened mail sat on the “In” box on the desktop, “High Lord Colm Arcadi” written on all the envelopes.

“Didn’t know you were into that New Age flim-flam, Scruffy.” I said when I noticed a large crystal sitting in a stand. The gem radiated a soft blue light, ribbons of smoke swirling in its center. It reacted when I touched the surface. “Whoa.”

“Oh, it finished chargin’ while I was gone!” Colm stated, claiming the crystal from its pedestal. “I can use me camera ‘gain!”

“Wait, what? That…actually does something?”

“Oh aye, it does! Ye see these spinnin’ things in here? Those are spells. The crystal keeps ‘em in there tuh help power certain objects. When the spells start tuh run low, ye can let’em sit in the sun fer a few hours or a few days an’ it’ll be good as new.”

“Oh. Cool. That’s pretty interesting, Scruffy.”

Unfortunately, that was the only bit of excitement for a long time. After a while, I was bored out of my skull.

“Sorry ‘bout this, Bridget.” Colm said, taking his eyes off of the papers he was reading to watch me stroll along the edge of his desk. “I thought I could breeze through most a’ these but…”

“It’s alright, Scruffy, it’s your job. Can’t have you half-assing paperwork just for little ol’ me, you know.” I stated, looking at the framed pictures Colm had along his desk. The first one was of him and Annie, in what must have been their prom picture. She had braces and he a black eye. I was about to ask him how he got it when I noticed the picture right next to it. “Oh hey, it’s the same photo!”

“What’s the same photo?”

“The one from your planner! When it was taken, you had to be what? 9 or 10?”

“8, actually, so that makes it nearly…good gods, 20 years ‘go already!” Colm replied, putting down a contract so he could get a better look at the picture. A smile crossed his face as he gazed at it. “It was the day befer school started ‘gain. Me dad, he was High Lord befer me, had tuh go intuh the office after this was taken, but ye know why this picture is so rare?”

“Why’s that, Scruffy?”

“Ye see me lil’ sister, Molly? She hates takin’ pictures. This is one a’ the few times ye get tuh see most uv’er face an’ it isne blurry.”

“Hah! I know how she feels! What are the chances of meeting any of them?”

“Well, me brother Liam an’ his family live here. He works in City Hall with me an’ was in charge while I was ‘way, so he’ll be home in time fer dinner. Molly married a few years ‘go an’ moved down south tuh Cork. She’s the Magistrate there now. As fer mum an’ dad…” Colm explained, his chipper tone fading as he moved on to his parents. “Dad had an accident ‘bout 10 years ‘go. Mum…mum always had a bad heart. She followed’im a few months later.”

The way he continued to stare at the picture, I couldn’t help but want to give him a moment to himself. I knew the look of painful reminiscence when I saw it.

“Mum used tuh say we were’er lil’ miracles…‘cuz the doctors told’er she’d ne’er be able tuh have kids. Thought’er heart coodne handle the strain a’ carryin’ tuh term an’ goin’ intuh labor. She sure showed’em though, huh? Had the three uv’us, poppin’ out all at once…”

“I’m sorry…” I said, the most meager of condolences that came to mind. What more could I have said?

“It’s alright, ye coodne have known. Heh. I think they woulda taken a likin’ tuh ye, now that I think ‘bout it.” Colm said, a small smile on his face as he placed the photograph back in its spot.

I continued looking at the other pictures on his desk, and even around the room, while he returned to his work. The sound of the door creaking open distracted me from the massive globe on one of the shelves. It had been a fruitless endeavor anyway, since I couldn’t make out any of the names on the distorted shapes. When I turned towards the door, I expected to see some Giant walk in. My hopes were raised that it was James with lunch, but they were dashed when I noticed who entered instead.

“Hey, you didn’t tell me you had a dog, Scruffy!” I shouted, daring to get as close to the edge of the desk as I could. It was an enormous puppy even by the Giant’s standards, but then that was to be expected from most wolfhound pups.

“We havne had a dog since Barlowe-!”

“RAWRF!”

“What the-?!” Colm exclaimed, rising from his seat to kneel beside the excitable puppy. The dog bounded to him in an instant. Colm scratched its head and pat its dark fur, laughing all the while. “Well, I’ll be! An’ where did ye come from, ye lil’ rascal?”

“MOM! MOM! UNCLE COLM’S HOME!” a pair of voices shouted in unison from the doorway. Twin girls, no older than 7 or 8, bounced into the room. One wore a red sundress, the other pink, but both had matching blonde French braids in their hair. They almost knocked Colm over when they ran to hug him. “Welcome back, Uncle Colm! We missed you!”

“I missed ye tuh, Elma, Ellie!” Colm said, kissing them both on the cheek in turn.

“Did you bring us anything?”

“Heh. Why would I need tuh, when ye got yerselves a new puppy while I was ‘way?” Colm chuckled, handing the puppy to one of the girls. It struggled to lick everyone in sight, even while in the kid’s hands.

“Mother said he’s supposed to be for all three of us, Uncle Colm.” another child said as he entered the room. He struggled to fix a bowtie that matched his bright, ginger hair before greeting his uncle. “We hope you don’t mind…”

“So long as ye remember tuh be gentle an’ take good care uv’im, I doona mind at all. Have a name fer the lil’ fella yet?”

“Well, I wanted to name him ‘Budgie’…”

“But he likes ‘Furgus’ better!” the girls said, the pup yapping when he heard his name.

A knock at the door caught everyone’s attention, thankfully long enough for me to make my way out of sight. It was pure luck the dog and none of the kids saw me, and if they had I wasn’t sure which one would have been the lesser of two evils. From my spot behind one of the picture frames, I was able to see everyone. A woman stood in the doorway dressed in violet, adjusting the dark brown hair that fell in waves down her back.

“The breeder has a show name on record for him, but I see no reason why the children shouldn’t be able to name him too.” she stated. “Their best grades yet, you know! I thought they deserved a little reward.”

“An’ how do ye top a puppy fer next time, Glori? Ponies?”

“Only if they earn straight A’s for the next five years.” she quipped, finally approaching Colm to greet him properly. They exchanged a hug and a kiss on the cheek. “Liam is going to want to have a few words with you when he returns, Colm.”

“If it’s ‘bout the paperwork, I swear it wasne pilin’ up on me desk at the office, I dunno how-!”

“King Gerwulf arrived for the ball. Early. Three days ago.” she informed him, in a serious tone of voice. “We managed to have the guest villa set up for him and his daughter, but Liam’s been on damage control the whole time. You’ll need to head over there as soon as you can. The king has been asking for you in particular.”

“I…a’…a’ course I will. Soon as I finish alla this, I’ll visit’em after lunch.” Colm eventually replied, too dumbfounded at first to say anything.

A pained look crossed his face when he noticed me hiding by the frame, but I waved him off. I hoped he understood the gesture. Before I could elaborate however, Furgus started sniffing the desk and knocked over the picture I used for cover.

“Oh wow, a human!” the kids shouted as they noticed me. Though the puppy was still in the red twin’s hands, it was clawing at the desk trying to get a closer “look”. I thought for sure it would be one of the kids or the dog itself I had to worry about.

I was proven wrong once I heard the screech.

“HOW’D IT GET IN HERE?! KILL IT KILL IT KILL IT! ” the woman shouted, grabbing the nearest book from a shelf and lifting it high. Considering the look in her eyes, and how heavy a volume it was, I ducked out of the way as fast as I could. The side of the inbox tray was the closest barrier on hand.

“Gloriana, stop! I brought‘er here!” Colm yelled, presumably keeping her from doing anything rash when he jumped towards her. I was too busy staying hidden and keeping my heart in my chest to check.

“What?! Why?!”

“‘Cuz she’s me new…that is…” he began to explain in an angry tone, but stopped and took a deep breath. He stood beside his desk, within my sight, and gestured toward me to come out into the open. I shook my head, hard enough for him to see. Even though he kept trying, the kids peeked over anyway to get a better look at me. “It’s alright, ye can come out.”  

“Is she unarmed?!” I shouted, hoping it was loud enough for her to hear. The dissatisfied humph I heard told me she had. I backed away from the inbox, but kept far from the dog, kids, and their mother.

“Gloriana, Elias, Elma, Ellie: I’d like ye tuh meet Bridget.” Colm said as formally as he could, before turning back to me. “Bridget, this is me brother Liam’s family. An’ their new puppy, Furgus.”

The kids showed their delight with waves and smiles, of which I barely returned, but their mother was another matter entirely.

“Is this why you decided you needed a week-long holiday by yourself, Colm?” Gloriana asked, her disapproval seething on each word.

“Aye, it was.”

“Children, please go wash your hands and get ready for lunch. Your uncle and I have a few things to discuss-!”

“No, we doona. There’s nothin’ that needs tuh be said on the matter, certainly not by ye. I’ve a human, this is’er home now, an’ that’s final.” Colm stated with an authority in his voice that I didn’t think he possessed. His brusqueness didn’t just take me by surprise, but Gloriana as well, and it showed. The air was thick with tension as Colm took his seat and returned to his paperwork. Not once did he give her the slightest of glances. “If ye can close the door behind ye on yer way out, that’ll be all.”

It was no surprise to hear the door slam shut. A moment passed before Colm let out a long sigh and leaned back in his chair, convinced she wasn’t about to make a reappearance.

“She’s gonna make me pay fer that somehow, I just know it…” he said, rubbing his eyes. “Guess we’re gonna have lunch in here, if ye doona mind. Oh, gods! Fergot yer table upstairs! Maybe I can get James tuh…Bridget? Are ye alright?”

“What? Yeah, I’m just…yeah…” I replied with a dry mouth, my knees wobbly all of a sudden. Sitting down beside the tray seemed to help. “I mean, I’ve been better, I guess.”

A worried look was on his face when I turned, and everything just came pouring out at the sight of it.

“SHE YELLED ‘KILL IT’ AND WAS ABOUT TO HIT ME WITH A BOOK! A FREAKING BOOK!” I explained with a bit more passion than I intended. “Is she…are there…are there others like that? About humans? Will people react like that?”

His uncomfortable silence didn’t put me at ease.

“And she…she lives here? With you? All the time?”

“I’m ‘fraid so…”

“Swell…”
So the "Colm tries to sneak in" bit was a last second idea and I have no regrets changing it from him simply walking in. It's another one of those things that kept playing out in my head and had me giggling longer than it should have.

Also I am not good at pictures within pictures.

>_>;;

All characters (c) Me!

Chapter 5: fav.me/d6j65d9

Chapter 7: fav.me/d6lfqjg
© 2013 - 2024 TheBrigeeda
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monikamoon14's avatar
Aye - heart attack and a half - ye sure know how to write a violent thrilling scene.